Single Parents-Have you ever lost a job due to childcare issues?

I am curious to know how many single parents have ever lost a job because they could not find qualified childcare? Or, the childcare you had made your child constantly sick so you had to miss work (daycares)? I am finding it to be the hardest thing in my life as a new parent and especially being single with no living family as a back-up plan. Though I am excellent at what I do, College educated, and considered a valuable employee, the childcare issue is always at the forefront. Now it may even cause me to lose my job.





Any personal experiences with this would be much appreciated. Thank you.

Single Parents-Have you ever lost a job due to childcare issues?
I believe, if your child's sick, the FMLA(?) says you can't be fired. If it's just daycare issues, and your a valuable employee, I think you boss will try to be understanding to the fact that your child has to come first. Good Luck.
Reply:I am not a single parent but yes I have lost a job because I needed to be home with my child during a difficult time.


Both my daughter and I have worked with children and I feel it is very important to have a back up plan. Perhaps there is a college near by where you could get names of girls who you could call when you need them. Even with that, you will need more then one name because of scheduling conflicts.


Good luck to you.
Reply:I worked a lot of night shifts on a Gyn-oncology unit. My mom lived with us, so the kids were not alone at night, but my youngest, then 11, hated being alone on the second floor of our house. My bedroom is across the hall from hers. My mom's was on the first floor and my son's room was in the basement.


She was so afraid to be upstairs alone she started sleeping on the living room floor. I would come home at 7 am to find every light on in the house. She started to sleepwalk, have nightmares, etc. She thought that if something happened, no one would be able to hear her call for help.


So, I went to Human Resources to see if I could get a different position that would require either day shifts only or day/evening rotation without the graveyard shift. The woman listened very sympathetically (I thought) and then said, that yes, she agreed that for the good of my family , I did need to change my hours. She said they had nothing available that would meet my needs. She wished me good luck. I was let go the next day. (I'm an RN, had received good performance reviews, was reliable, etc)
Reply:I was a single parent for 5 years. I worked for a dental office owned by a corporation. When I had been there for about 3 years, and had worked my way up the ladder to being the back office manager, the corporate office discovered that they could make more money if they required our office to be open till 7 pm 2 nights a week and every Saturday. In the beginning, I did a swing shift with another assistant. I would work from 8-5 and she would work 10-7 on these late days. We would either trade off Saturdays, or I would work the morning and she would work the afternoon. After a few weeks, the corporate executives said that they wanted both of us there at all times. My office manager explained to them that I had worked for them for over 3 years, was the back office manager, and that I was a single mom, whose daycare did not stay open that late nor did it open on Saturdays. They told her very bluntly "Either she works the hours we set, or you get yourself a new back office manager." My being the employee who had worked in that office for the longest, and being in a manager position, didn't matter to them at all. I decided right then that I did not want to work for people like that, so I quickly found another job, and put in my notice. I only gave 1 week, and they had the gall to complain that I wasn't giving them 2 weeks. As if they deserved it, after what they did to me. I also lost 10 days of paid vacation when I left. But there was nothing else I could do. I coudn't work the hours they needed me to, and wouldn't have wanted to anyways.





My boss now, has no children and isn't married. He has very little compassion for the moms in the office. One of my co-workers had a child with pinkeye and had to stay at home with him for 2 days. I walked in on him complaining to the office manager about it, and when he saw I had overheard him he turned and asked me "So what kind of back up plan do you have if one of your kids gets sick?" I point blank told him, "I AM the back up plan. I'm their mom." Before I was not in a financial position to get too mouthy, but now that my husband has just started a new job making more money, I WILL not be expected to choose between my kids or my job. I had planned to continue working until be had paid off our debt and done some much needed household repairs, but if it comes down to needing to choose between my kids and my job, he can stick it where the sun don't shine!
Reply:Sadly, a majority of employers (yes, even the retail jobs and call center jobs) look at us working moms as a burden when our children get sick. While I have never lost a job due to my child's health, I knew of a gal who was hired at this one place I worked at who had a 4 yr old little girl. She had been employed for maybe a month when her little girl caught pneumonia and was hospitalized for over a week. The gal was able to rotate bed-side shifts with her mother, but still ended up missing 4 days of work and our p r i c k boss still fired her for it. Sorry, but the first employer who tries to tell me that my committment to my place of employment comes before my child will not only be told where to put it, but they'll also get a great hand gesture while I am telling them where to put it.
Reply:I was in the same situation with my first one, until I learned to get a back up babysitter.......it is always good to find one that usually can take your child at the last min.......call around in your area for providers that do this!! Or look on craigslist
Reply:I got lucky in that my child's school has daycare on site, so I don't have to worry about reliability. And she does catch a cold sometimes, but rarely enough for me to call out sick. Mostly I just drag my sick sorry butt into work, and save all my sick/vacation days for when she needs me.





This is not the easy solution, but perhaps it would do you good to look into a school change, or even district change, that will allow you more options regarding childcare. I had to move a couple cities over with my daughter to make things work - I just couldn't make it where I was when I became a single parent.
Reply:I am in your shoes girl... My job hates it when i have to take care of my little one. There's nothing you can do but take care of your child and they need to understand that family and your child comes first. Sit down and talk to your boss. I had to do that the other day and it really made me feel better. This is something out of your control.
Reply:the same thing happened to me , i swear to this day i dont know how i am surviving as a single mother when now i only work part time , i am glad you asked this question because i thought i was the only one going though such a tough situtation with no help ,, good luck to you and all the best to the single mothers out there !
Reply:When i first became a custodial dad it greatly affected my career as a machinist, daycare was the biggest issue, with 3 children it always seemed one was getting sick and the daycares were always calling me over the littlest things, untill i moved them into a home daycare, in a home daycare they were more sympathetic to the need for a single parents requirement for stable employment, plus they would even watch my children if they were not feeling well to enable me to work, in turn i would do favors for them also, such as yard work, fix their computer system, and even lend a hand during my days off at their daycare, which enabled a closer and more personal relationship with the daycare provider, deepening the level of care she would give my children.


I found daycare centers to be impersonal and lacked a relaxed atmosphere that children need.


Find a home daycare, and devolope a friendly personal relationship with them and you will find things will get better.





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Reply:Just did today as a matter of fact.
Reply:I wasn't a single mom but yes been there. No family close by to help me out. I drended calling into work when my son got sick. I always took in the note from the doctor but my boss was still and ***, and my boss was a woman. Do you know any of your neighbors that you would trust. How about a co-worker maybe they could refer you to someone. social services have lists of licensed day care providers that might be able to help you out. A couple of single moms that I worked with were members of support groups. And they got a lot of help and back up when they needed it. You might be able to find something from social services. That agency does more than just help people on welfare. They have great programs. Good luck to you
Reply:Yes I have. Not finding afterhours childcare or having to take off from work if my child got sick.
Reply:Thats the hardest thing parents have to deal with: The possibility of losing their jobs due to time off with sick kids. I had been at my current job for one week when my son was put in the hospital for a week due to RSV. I thought for sure my boss was going to fire me but she didnt. Im married now, but its better I miss work than my husband due to the fact that he makes 2x as much as I do.. now, my boss is out of town, its only me here and my son is sick and the babysitter said she wont watch him tomorro. I have no idea what to do.


I think the only thing you can do is remember that you are first and foremost a mother. If being a mother is what causes you to lose a job there are more out there even if its a side job bagging groceries until a better one comes along. You cant stress about what's going to happen just live day to day and go with what your given. Thats what I've learned and I was a single mom for 10 years. I know its easier said than done. Good Luck honey.
Reply:have not personlly known that but have worked with coworkers dealing very close to this issue





when you are the sole caretaker of the said child it can be alot to take on but the personal satisfaction and benefits outweigh the junk





just the same companies need to wake up to the issues of parents with children